


The Marshal Conference

by Macremae, purpleeyesandbowties



Category: EOS 10 (Podcast), Sparks Nevada Marshal on Mars, The Thrilling Adventure Hour
Genre: F/F, Humor, M/M, bordering on crack tbh, everyone is gay in space, fluff I suppose, the crossover fic no one wanted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-04
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-18 03:11:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5895868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Macremae/pseuds/Macremae, https://archiveofourown.org/users/purpleeyesandbowties/pseuds/purpleeyesandbowties
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>EOS 10 is hosting the annual Marshal Conference and Ryan is assigned to welcome the Marshal of Mars and his guests.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> based off a conversation roomfullofdaisies and i had forever ago. i might come back to this sometime and write more, but i'm marking as complete for now. 
> 
> this fic pulls some info from my fic In Too Deep, but you don't have to read it to follow this one
> 
> chapter one by purpleeyesandbowties (sadhipstercat on tumblr)  
> chapter two by Macremae (roomfullofdaisies on tumblr)

Ryan stood next to airlock thirty-two, waiting for the next ship to come in. He fidgeted impatiently, sighing every few moments. It wasn’t that he wasn’t flattered to be picked to welcome the new guests onboard—he was, and he was happy to do it—but they were late and he had dinner plans. The interplanetary annual marshal’s conference was being held on EOS 10 this year. Ryan had been assigned to guide and assist the marshal of—Ryan checked his clipboard—Mars. And guests. Ryan raised an eyebrow curiously. Marshal Sparks Nevada, accompanied by deputy Croach the Tracker and guest The Red Plains Rider. Someone had scratched out the word ‘deputy’ and written in “I am not the deputy of Sparks Nevada, merely filling a similar position in order to complete my onus to him.” Another person, in a much less legible scrawl, had added, “I gotta put you down as deputy otherwise you won’t be allowed to come, Croach. Red’s already my plus one.”

“I am putting you under onus for this,” threatened the first person’s handwriting. The second person squeezed in an irritated looking “whatever”. Then, thankfully, there was no more room for arguing on paper.

Well, Ryan thought, at least his guests would be interesting.

The Interface’s voice rang through the airlock. “Incoming vessel. Prepare for landing.”

It would take a few moments for the marshal’s ship to dock and depressurize. In the meantime, Ryan glanced over the sparse information he had been given. He knew that the marshal of Mars was a well-known authority figure. Apparently, he had saved Mars and a good chunk of the universe several times over. Ryan wondered what he’d be like. No-nonsense, probably. Definitely someone who commanded respect. Ryan just hoped he wasn’t a total asshole, as they’d be spending quite a bit of time together in the next week.

The airlock hissed open and Ryan snapped to attention. He watched as three figures emerged, two of them in a heated conversation.

“No, Croach, you can’t put me under onus for callin’ you my deputy! That’s what you are, iffin you would just accept the title.”

“Sparks Nevada, I am not, and never will be, your deputy. I am fulfilling onus and nothing more.”

Ryan, struck suddenly with the double images of Jane and Levi bickering, cleared his throat.

“Hi. I’m Doctor Ryan Dalias, your guide for the week. Marshal Nevada?”

“That’s me,” said a surprisingly short man. He had ginger hair, messy and curly, skin a few shades darker than Ryan’s, and a comfortable smile. (Though Ryan would later classify it as ‘a shit-eating grin’). He stuck out his hand. “Call me Sparks. That there is my _deputy_ , Croach.”

The blue alien gave Sparks a withering glare but nodded politely at Ryan. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Doctor Dalias. I am not the deputy of Sparks Nevada, and he has once again, mispronounced my designation. I am _Croach_ the Tracker.”

Ryan nodded, pretending to hear the difference between the two words. “Croach,” he repeated. The alien turned to the marshal. “This relative stranger can pronounce my designation correctly,” he said accusatorily.

“Yeah, whatever.”

They quickly got into another argument, Sparks complaining about “marjuns and their picky ears” and Ryan decided to stop listening. Instead, he offered his hand to the woman standing next to them. She was watching with disinterest as the other two exchanged insults.

“Hello, welcome to EOS 10,” Ryan said. The woman glanced at him, surprised. She was beautiful, Ryan noted, tall and graceful, but unmistakably strong under her long overcoat and button-down shirt. She smiled, adding to her rough beauty. “I’m Red,” she offered, shaking his hand. “Don’t you mind these two buffoons. They’re at each other’s throats constantly.”

Ryan smiled politely, at a loss for what to say. Red studied him intently and Ryan blushed under her gaze. She smiled slyly, causally stepping closer. “After a long ride with those two charmers, you are a quite a welcome sight.”

Ryan coughed, stepping back a little. “I—I’m sorry, I already have—”

He was saved from his stuttering explanation by a sudden, warm presence at his back. Ryan had gotten so used to Akmazian literally dropping in over the past few months that it didn’t even faze him when he fell into place behind Ryan. Presumably from an air vent, but there was really no telling with Akmazian. Akmazian smiled serenely at Red, chin resting on top of Ryan’s head and arms wrapped around his shoulders. Red got over her initial surprise of his sudden appearance quickly.

“Too bad,” she said with a sly wink.

“This is my boyfriend Akmazian,” Ryan supplied helplessly. All at once, the airlock fell silent. The marshal and the alien had ceased their bickering, and Croach was staring directly at Ryan and Akmazian. Akmazian dropped his arms from Ryan and took a step towards the pair.

“Croach?” he asked, voice disbelieving. “Is…is that you?”

“Akmazian?” Croach said, sounding vulnerable. Ryan had only known Croach for a few minutes and even he knew that that tone was unusual for him. Ryan’s suspicions were confirmed as Sparks’ mouth fell open in surprise, his eyebrows shooting up. Red’s face a more subdued copy of Sparks’, with a dash of mischievous anticipation thrown in.

Akmazian took another step towards Croach, a wavering smile on his face. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Fifteen rotations, give or take?”

“Seventeen,” corrected Croach. He took a hesitating step towards Akmazian. Suddenly, Akmazian grinned hugely and ran the remaining paces to Croach. He threw his arms around him, pulling him into a giant bear-hug that lifted him off the ground. Spark’s jaw hit the floor, followed by Ryan’s. Red laughed.

Croach’s feet hit the ground again, his face flushed a deep purple.

Akmazian chuckled, running a finger across a flushed cheekbone. Croach flushed again and ducked his arm.

“What the hell?” asked Sparks. Ryan nodded his agreement.

“Croach and I go way back,” Akmazian said fondly. “I grew up on Mars, not far from his tribe. We…well.”

Ryan immediately knew what he meant, but Sparks was lost. He looked between the two, the most profound look of confusion Ryan had ever seen on his face.

“What….how….?”

Akmazian took pity on the marshal. “I met him one day, on the red plains when we were only kids still. He was lookin’ for a lady friend who’d run away to find herself,” he tipped his hat at Red. “I sure hope you did, miss.”

Red grinned. “I mighta,” she said.

“Damn near broke this one’s heart, it did. He… well, we found solace in each other. It was nice. Spent some years together, meant to spend a lot more. But, well, some things aren’t meant to be.”

Croach blushed again. Sparks looked more and more incredulous by the second.

“You….went out with him? I thought you said Red was your first sweetheart!”

“….second,” Croach admitted. Sparks looked too shocked to speak.

“Hang on,” Ryan said. “Croach….he isn’t….he’s not the guy that left you at the altar when you were nineteen, is he?”

He looked sharply at Croach, remembering the quiet pain in Akmazian’s face when he had first told Ryan of his first heartbreak. Croach, for his part, looked regretful.

“It was not my intent to hurt Akmazian,” he said, directing the words at Ryan.

Akmazian scratched his neck sheepishly. “He met someone else. The heart wants what the heart wants.” His tone was pacifying and steady. _I’m fine,_ his eyes promised. He gave Croach one last hug and stepped away.

“Seventeen rotations,” Sparks said slowly. “Ain’t—ain’t that about when you an’ me started ridin’ together, Croach?”

Red rolled her eyes. “Nevada, you are _dumber_ than a box a’ space rocks, I swear.”

“I—you—” Sparks turned to Croach, disbelief written on his face. “You—you left your…boyfriend for me?”

“Fiancé,” Akmazian supplied helpfully.

“Because you—all this time, you, you’ve been…sweet on me?” Sparks asked, a blush overtaking his face.

Croach held his head high, gathering some pretense of dignity. “I did have….feelings for you unconnected to my onus, Sparks Nevada.”

Sparks shook his head as if to clear it. “I—do you still feel that way?”

Croach pursed his lips. “You have made it clear that those feelings went unreciprocated.”

“That’s not what I asked, Croach. I asked if you still…you know, um, loved me.”

“I do not have to answer such a question. I put you under onus for—”

“Because I might feel the same!” Sparks burst out. He immediately snapped his mouth shut, looking horrified.

Silence.

Sparks sighed, wringing his hands. “Croach, I, I’m not sayin’ I know exactly what it is I feel for you. I’m just sayin’ that we’ve been ridin’ together for long enough with things still at odds. I know there’s things I should’a said to you a long time ago.” He waited for a response from Croach. When none came, he shook his head ruefully. “Aw, hell. Forget it. Nevermind.”

“No,” said Croach. “I should very much like to hear these things, Sparks Nevada. It would…eliminate some of the onus you bear should you tell me.”

“I don’t _bear_ you any onus, I—actually, okay, fine. Let’s talk.”

Ryan, with Akmazian back at his side, breathed, “Maybe we should leave?”

Akmazian gave a low chuckle and twined his fingers with Ryan’s. “This is just getting interesting, darlin’.”

“But you—didn’t he hurt you? Aren’t you upset?”

“Me? No. I’m happy for him. What me an’ him had was a long time ago, babe. I loved him, I really did. And he loved me. But we were just kids, like I said. We would have never worked out in the long run. Besides, if he hadn’t gotten _cold feet_ …” Akmazian let out a huff of laughter, and Red did too. Ryan frowned, obviously missing an inside joke. Akmazian wiped the smile from his face, serious again. “If I _had_ ended up marryin’ Croach, then, darlin’, I would have never met you.”

He lowered his voice so that only Ryan could hear, lips brushing Ryan’s ear. “And fallin’ in love with you was the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Ryan was the one to blush this time. He squeezed Akmazian’s hand, trying to convey everything he felt for this insufferable, annoying, beautiful, _perfect_ man without saying a word.

Akmazian seemed to understand. He pressed a kiss to Ryan’s temple.

Several feet away from them, Sparks and Croach were talking in low tones. They went back and forth quickly, like an argument, but their faces were soft and uncertain.  At last, Sparks reached out and took Croach’s hand. Croach’s shoulders fell in relief, the tension leaving his body.

“Finally,” Red mumbled, watching them. “I was gettin’ tired of watching those fools dance ‘round each other.”

“Happy to be of assistance,” Ryan muttered to himself. Red shot him a smile.

Sparks and Croach were still whispering to each other, blushing like a pair of teenagers, and Ryan knew he wouldn’t interrupt them for anything.

He was about to offer Red a tour of the ship when Jane burst into the airlock.

“Ryan! It’s been, like, forever, and you still haven’t brought your guests to their rooms! The conference starts in a couple hours and they still need the tour.”

Red stepped into their line of vision. She gave Jane a once-over, taking in the blood-spattered scrubs and messy ponytail. She smiled charmingly.

“Maybe you could give me the tour then, hmm?” Red said. Jane tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and bit her lip shyly.

“Sure. I’m Jane, by the way. Jane Johns. Nurse Jane Johns. Lieutenant Commander Nurse Jane Johns if you want to get really specific, which, I mean, you kinda look like you do. Want to…get specific. What I mean is, you look like the kind of girl who appreciates details. About a person! Like, what they do. Not like, about how they look or, or, if they like gir—you know what, I’m just….I’m just gonna leave. Bye!”

Red grabbed her arm as she spun to leave. “I’m Red. The Red Plains Rider if you want to get specific. Maybe you could…give me a tour? Show me the _details_?”

Turning an alarming shade of red, Jane squeaked out an ‘okay’. On her way out the door, arm in arm with Red, she mouthed “what the hell?” over her shoulder at Ryan. But her face was lit up with a smile Ryan had only see her direct at Doctor Osolong in the past, so he just waved cheerfully.

The week was sure to be interesting.


	2. Chapter two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is by Macremae (roomfullofdaisies)

Jane was beginning to understand why a lot of people hated Jupes.   
  
Technically, as a doctor she wasn't allowed to call them Jupes, but right then, all bets were off. The Hippocratic Oath could suck a dick, because God forbid any important event on this clusterfuck station go according to plan. Of course a Jupitarian spy would sneak in as the Marshall of Venus. Of course it was the infamous one who wrecked havoc on Mars a few years ago. Of-fucking-course Levi would try to fight it for his  goddamn honor and not stand a chance and get blood everywhere and SON OF A BITCH IT GOT AWAY.   
  
Rapidly finding new and creative ways to drop the f-bomb, Jane skidded to a stop at the first weapons closet she came across, grabbed the biggest and most painful looking plasma rifle there was, and hurried after in hot pursuit of the little purple bastard.    
  
After five minutes of adrenaline-and-rage-fueled running, she found it trying to club into one of the air vents. It turned it's head, noticing her, and cheerily backed up against the wall.   
  
"Heya there Doc, neat gun you've got there. You gonna to use it on 'lil old me?", it said.   
  
After catching her breath, Jane grinned triumphantly. "That's the plan."   
  
"Hmm," the Jupe mused, "an interesting goal. However, better plan: you don't shoot me, the magnificent Jib Janeen, and I go home to Glorious Jupiter!"   
  
"Not a chance in hell."   
  
"Well that's gonna be a prob Bob, because getting shot was not on my to-do list."   
  
"Chasing a spy wasn't on mine either, but here we both are. You do realize that like, ninety percent of the stuff you've done here is super illegal."   
  
Jib shrugged. "I've done nothing wrong in the eyes of my superior home planet. Besides, I prefer to think of the Alliance laws as a suggestion, like don't touch or dry clean only."   
  
Oh, right, Jupiter wasn't one of the planets under the Alliance. Godammit.   
  
"Okay, uh, you guys like secrets right?"    
  
His face lit up. "Do we ever! Whaddaya got in mind missy?"   
  
"I tell you a secret of mine that I've never told anyone, and you leave EOS 10. Deal?"   
  
Jib hummed and seemed to contemplate the trade. He made a few clicking noises with his tongue, then stuck out a hand.   
  
"Lady, ya got yourself a deal."   
  
Jane sighed and ran through all of the things that she had never told anyone. Too embarrassing, illegal, not very juicy, illegal, boring, illegal, illegal, illegal in Iowa and Kepler-25...   
  
"Oh, got it." she said, finding one that fell under a topic she had no qualms about discussing. "Okay, so ever since I watched Brokeback Mountain when I was like, sixteen, I've had this thing for cowboy stuff. Like, I guess you could call it a western kink. There, happy?"   
  
Looking mildly amused, Jib gave her finger guns. "You're weird pal, I like you. So, you gonna let me go?"   
  
Jane slung the rifle over her shoulder and nodded. "Yeah, get out of here."   
  
"Alrighty-tighty! Pleasure doin' business with ya. Say high to Sparkles and his babe for me!"   
  
And with that confusing farewell, he shifted into a bacon-patterned bald eagle and flew into airlock twelve.   
  
Airlock twelve...   
  
Airlock.   
  
Airlock!   
  
Shit.   
  


**Author's Note:**

> as always, i'm sadhipstercat on tumblr, 100% here for screaming about my gay space nerds (all of them)


End file.
